Missing You
by tarin2014tfan
Summary: Three turtles are hurting for their missing sibling.


**Missing You**

**Disclaimer** \- I do not own TMNT or any of the characters therein. Some VERY rich dude does.  
**Rating** \- Mature Audiences ONLY  
**Story Warnings** \- Emotional distress, Character death, Grieving, Swearing, Anger towards God, (Don't like these topics? Do not read!)  
**Pairings** \- None, None implied (Do not like? Do not read!)  
**Universe** \- 2003  
**Ages** \- Leo, Donnie, and Mikey are all of the equivalent age of 26. (I made them this age to account for time passage in the series storyline.)  
**Story Credits** \- Song : I Drive Your Truck by Lee Brice  
**Author's Notes** \- **_Song Lyrics_**

**Summary** \- Three turtles are hurting for their missing sibling.

**Missing You**

He stood just inside the garage leaning against the wall next to the elevator. He stared blankly out into the room, seeing nothing in front of him yet seeing everything that had ever happened in there at the same time.

His larger-than-life brother dominating every scene.

**_Eighty-nine cents in the ash tray_**

He sighed, dropping his gaze to some random spot by his feet. He wished he could make it all go away. What he was feeling. What he was thinking. What had happened.

He also never wanted to forget a single second.

**_Half empty bottle of Gatorade rolling in the floorboard_**

Reaching deep inside, he found the strength to push away from the wall, to enter the space his brother once ruled.

In a small section, he still did.

**_That dirty Braves cap on the dash_**

The far corner.

The one shrouded in constant shadow, no matter how brightly the lights glowed.

Like now.

**_Dog tags hanging from the rear view_**

Unconsciously he headed in that direction. As if his feet knew where he needed to be.

He paused partway there, his eyes drawn to the sole remaining stain on the floor. They had painted, twice, but this one spot they never touched.

It was a reminder.

**_Old Skoal can, and cowboy boots and a Go Army Shirt_**

Something they all hated with every ounce of their being.

Something they all wanted.

Needed.

Like the very air they breathed.

**_Folded in the back_**

Stopping just outside the shadows, he reached for the only thing still kept there.

His fingertips brushed against the silver tarp. Tracing the hills and valleys created by the vehicle underneath.

**_This thing burns gas like crazy, but that's alright_**

He blinked rapidly as his eyes began to burn.

With a whimper he yanked the tarp away, throwing it as far behind him as he could.

**_People got their ways of coping_**

It was beautiful.

The filtered light danced along the polished surface, bringing a semblance of life back to the sleek machine.

He caressed the shining surface, letting his fingers play alone the chrome and cherry red colors, the leather of the seat.

A sad smile played along his lips.  
**_  
Oh, and I've got mine_**

He tapped the gas tank with a knuckle, thankful for the deep resounding tone.

It was full.

**_I drive your truck_**

It was always full.

He unfastened the saddlebag, lifting the lid. The matching helmet, scarred and dented, lay nestled inside.

Face up.

As if smiling in anticipation.

**_I roll every window down and I burn up_**

He pulled on the battered brown leather jacket folded neatly beside the helmet, put the helmet on his head, and turned the key.

**_Every back road in this town_**

It was comforting to hear the rumble of the engine, to feel the vibrations running through his body.

It made him feel a little more alive.

**_I find a field, I tear it up_**

He slowly eased the bike out into the alley, not bothering to close the door.

**_Till all the pain's a cloud of dust_**

He knew one, if not both, of his brothers was watching. They would close it.

**_Yeah, sometimes I drive your truck_**

They always did.

* * *

He moved carefully through the city streets. He didn't really care if he picked up a cop.

He just didn't want to get anyone hurt.

**_I leave that radio playing_**

No one deserved to be waiting at home only to find out someone they loved was hurt.

Dying.

**_Same old country station where you left it_**

And they not be there.

**_Yeah, man I crank it up_**

He took the first on-ramp he came to, caring only that it lead to the highway.

And freedom.

**_And you'd probably punch my arm right now_**

Halfway up, he opened the throttle. By the time he merged onto the highway, he was moving at full speed.

The traffic nothing more than barely noticed blurs.

**_If you saw this tear rolling down on my face_**

He flew. Trying to leave all the hurt behind him.

It clung like a desperate child.

**_Hey, man I'm trying to be tough_**

Tears blurred his vision.

He reached up wiping them away.

**_And Momma asked me this morning, if I'd been by your grave_**

He wished they would stop.

He wished there were more.

**_But that flag and stone ain't where I feel you anyway_**

His brother deserved them.

* * *

He wove through the cars, mindless of how close he came.

He didn't have a death wish.

Really, he didn't.

**_I drive your truck_**

He just wanted to stop the pain.

Or at the very least, lessen it.

And maybe find some of what he had lost in the process.

**_I roll every window down and I burn up_**

How does a person go on, with a huge hole in their heart?

With part of their soul gone forever?

How do you go on?

How?

**_Every back road in this town_**

It wasn't right!

There were only four of them in all the world! And to lose one...

How were they supposed to go on?!

**_I find a field, I tear it up_**

They were rare.

Treasures!

If to no one else, at least to each other.

He wanted his treasure back.  
**_  
Till all the pain's a cloud of dust_**

WHY!?

Why did it happen!?

Why did his brother have to die!?

**_Yeah, sometimes I drive your truck_**

It wasn't fair!

But, then again, life had never been fair to them.

* * *

He saw the lights of an exit ramp.

He took it, not caring about the blaring horns and angry shouts left behind in his wake.  
**_  
I've cussed, I've prayed, I've said goodbye_**

He pulled off the deserted road into the first secluded place he found, bringing the bike to a safe stop.

Not out of concern for his own safety, but rather the bike's.

It was one of the few things they had left.

One of the rare parts of his missing brother he still had.

**_Shook my fist and asked God why_**

He sat unmoving, breathing hard from the intensity of his emotions.

His tears flowed freely, bringing with them the heaving sobs that so often left him weak and breathless.

He threw his head back, breaking the silence of the night with his pain and fury.  
**_  
These days when I'm missing you this much_**

"WHY!? Why did you let him die!? He was my brother!"

He shook his fist at the star speckled sky above.

"DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU TO HELL!"

His body quaked with the force of his pain.

"Damn you!" he sobbed. "I want him back."

* * *

**_I drive your truck_**

"I want him back."

The garage door opened. It didn't surprise the lone turtle sitting in the shadows.

It was expected.

He stood when he heard the oh so familiar rumble grow louder.

**_I roll every window down_**

He waited patiently as his returning brother removed the helmet he wore, and neatly folded the leather jacket, placing both on the leather seat.

"Mikey?" he asked quietly.

His brother turned, not bothering to try and hide the soul deep pain permanently etched on his face.

He said nothing more, having stopped asking if Mikey was alright long ago.

Mikey wasn't alright.

**_And I burn up_**

None of them were alright. They never would be again.

Slowly, Mikey made his way to his brother.

"I know, Leo."

**_Every back road in this town_**

He stopped just short of touching the leaf green skin.

"But, you're not the brother I'm looking for."

With a heart wrenching sob, Mikey threw himself against Leo's plastron, clinging desperately.

"I wish you were," he sobbed. "I know where to find you."

**_I find a field, I tear it up_**

Together they cried. As they often had before.

They shared their pain, the pain of missing a vital part of themselves.

His sobs quieted. His tears slowed.

"I gassed it up," he said, wiping his eyes.

**_Till all the pain's a cloud of dust, yeah sometimes,_**

Leo nodded. He already knew.

It was expected.

**_Brother sometimes_**

He waited until the elevator doors had closed, then turned towards the bike sitting under the strongest light.

It looked expectant.

He slipped on the helmet, pulled on the jacket.

**_I drive your truck_**

"I'll only be gone for about an hour, Don. I'll gas it up for you before I come back."

Another brother slipped from the shadows.

"I'll get the door for you when you leave."

It was expected.

**_I drive your truck_**

It was their routine now.

A routine of endlessly searching.

Searching for what was gone.

Searching for an end to the pain.

**_I hope you don't mind_**

Leo roared off into the night, searching yet again.

Don watched as the garage door slowly closed.

He glanced at the workbench.

Should he stay here, alone?

He glanced at the elevator.

Should he wait with Mikey?

**_I hope you don't mind,_**

He walked to the workbench, sitting on the edge.

He would wait.

Here.

But he wasn't alone.

In the quiet hours, he could hear his missing brother.

**_I drive your truck_**

He had found what Leo and Mikey still searched for.

It only made the pain that much worse.

* * *

Thanks for reading.


End file.
